Hello Friends,
During this joyful, busy, and exciting time of year, I often drift back to the concerts, assemblies, and Christmas plays I was a part of from elementary to high school and even to one of my first acting gigs in A Christmas Carol. For some reason my mind also drifts to the time when I did not make the middle school holiday play, twice. I was torn by the music director’s decision but luckily, I didn’t let it navigate my acting career. When I heard a friend tell me the following story I thought it would be interesting to start a dialogue about how early we should start judging who can perform and who can’t? The names have been modified to protect the identity of the individuals and school.
A friend of mine, Ms. D, teaches at a phenomenal elementary school that has a well-established performing arts program. It was holiday concert day and Michael came in ecstatic that he would be performing in his guitar group. He was glowing because not only would he be performing but also his mom had bought him a new shirt that put an extra kick in his step.
Before the pledge of allegiance began, his classmates were telling Michael that he had mistaken, his guitar group was not performing today. Upset, he laid his head on the desk and his upbeat stature quickly faded. Ms D knew he had told his mom to come and she was not sure what to do. Both of Michael’s parents were hearing impaired and Michael did not know how to use sign language so it was unclear whether communication in the family was difficult. In addition, his parents had recently been separated. It was a unique situation and Ms D could feel it weighing heavy on him. It was time for her students to continue their reading assignment and since reading did not come easy to Michael, she told him he could listen to a recorded version of the story on CD. While Michael happily accepted the alternative to reading the story, Ms. D attempted to get to the bottom of this concert blunder. She sent a student down to the music room to see if it was completely true about Michael’s guitar group not performing.
Unfortunately, the news was correct. Michael was in the second guitar group and for some reason they were not performing at the concert. Ms D left a message on his mother’s voicemail so that she could bring him a change of clothes. When the classes had all filed into the auditorium, Michael’s mother arrived confused. Ms. D communicated to her by writing down what was happening. His mother wrote, “Will he perform tomorrow night? His father is coming up for it.” Ms D felt her heart sink. She saw her principal and pulled him over to ask about the evening performance of the concert in hopes he would take pity on this situation and figure out a way for Michael’s group to perform. The principal said he would find out and unfortunately never came back. After a few more notes back and forth, the vice principal approached and gave some assistance. The vice principal was able to find out that Michael’s guitar group was not performing in the evening holiday concert.
Michael s mother’s face was not angry but confused and hiding disappointment. Her last note to Ms. D read “what about the spring concert?” Ms. D wrote back, “I would think so.” Ms. D’s heart ached, why couldn’t Michael’s group perform today? Isn’t this a school that prides itself on diversity and community? Where did her principal disappear too?
Michael had a lot of obstacles and wasn’t in the best guitar group, should his group been denied the chance to perform at the winter concert cause of logistics? Is allowing everyone to perform teaching something that’s misleading?
Personally, I was teary eyed when I heard this story. Especially because I am familiar with the district and exclusion is usually not an occurrence. I don’t think anyone meant to exclude Michael’s group and there was probably a valid reason for not having guitar group two perform. However picturing his mother not getting to see her son perform like all the other parents that came to school that day, broke my heart, especially given her circumstances and that Michael felt so good about performing.
I do have to commend Ms. D for being the teacher to try to make it an easier day for Michael. By not letting him know she felt bad or pity for him, she choose to make his day slightly easier by but by giving him opportunities to feel better and motivated to be in school. Hats off Ms D!
Live, Love, Learn,
Michele & The Write Teacher(s)